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Showing posts from September, 2023

091623AM

I dreamt of Jesus, the Blessed Sacrament. Last night, my eyes saw the Host and I had to protect Him. He was desecrated, nullified by His own. As a KoA, I merely do what i am told as i wanted to serve Jesus. But now, Jesus showed Himself and how He is offended. In the dream, I was quite hostile in delivering to mass-goers how they need to consume the Host at once. I have not yet felt this way joining the KoA since I had already charged a woman who was trying to take to her seat the precious Body of our Lord. He is already beat up and offended, should we let Him feel more of this?

Why

Why do I think that my greatest joy isn't for what it is, but of what it could've been in the presence of a her. I wish to enter the priesthood forsaking all chances of having a one and only despite all the grievances. These grievances that I have, towards myself and my lack of preparation and discernment, lead me to doubt whether I can trust the gifts that the Lord has given me to provide me contentment in this life with the hope that by serving Him well, I will be content for all eternity. By His saving grace, can this world be the one where I forsake all this for the girl that will satisfy my heart's desire, a half to be filled? Or the other desire, as it always was meant to be, which is to leave it empty and receive the crown of heroic life sacrificed for all else. A classmate keeps on asking, am I really entering the priesthood? A tita keeps on asking, what will you be when you grow up? a friend asks, when will u enter? I have no clue even of the faintest of God's ...